From 'new school' fears to keeping things organized, there's lots to prepare for this fall

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by Hanne Armstrong
This Week Staff

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"Going back to school can be stressful for kids and parents, even those who look forward to it," says Allen Marr , the learning specialist and psychologist for School District 2. Allen has been a school psychologist for 25 years, and has some helpful advice for parents at this time of year.

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For starters, contrary to what commercials and advertising flyers claim, it isn't usually necessary to supply your child with a new wardrobe for September. Clothes worn in August, as long as they're appropriate, work fine for school.

"There's no rush to buy clothes," Allen says, "and it can put a financial strain on some families. The main essential is a sturdy pair of shoes." If shopping is part of your positive preparation for the return to school, put the emphasis on school supplies.

It's the patterns in the home, though, that really help get students and parents ready for school.

"Re-establish early bed-time a week or two before school starts," advises Allen, "and get kids to set their own alarm clocks. Start making sure the kids have breakfast, and turn the TV off in the mornings. Get used to the fact that mornings are going to be different."

"Choose and stick to a place in the house where homework is to be done," he adds, "Keeping in mind that younger children will need parental help."

It's a good idea to take students new to a school in before the crowds show up. Seeing the surroundings and meeting the teacher ahead of time can make the first day of school much less stressful.

Then, when that first day comes, establish good habits and routines right away.

"If this is your first child's first ever day in school," urges Allen, "give him or her some reassurance, say good-bye, and leave. Don't linger and display your own distress.

"And for after school, have an agreed place for lunch boxes and back-packs to be put, and have your child be responsible for emptying them daily," he suggests. "During the first week, have a look at the books or papers your kids bring home, and become familiar with them."

Allen also suggests that parents take the time to get to know the school guidance counsellors and other staff members who may interact with their children. Have personal health and emergency information ready for school staff at the start of school.

It might even be an idea to freeze some dinners, to free up extra time with your child during that first week of adjustment.

If last year was a bit of a squeaker, and there's a desire to improve academically this year, talk to the teachers about it; most are willing to give extra help to parents and students who want it.

"Homework should be done as soon after school as possible," Allen encourages. "As to extra-curricular activities, one or two is usually plenty."

All well and good, you may say, but my kids are teenagers, so where does that leave me?

"It takes a little more work," replies Allen, "but try to be involved with your teens' school lives. If good habits and relations have been in place over the years, it's a little easier."

Good habits, routines, a little luck, and the return to school should go just fine.

"The transition from a relaxed summer to the increased activity and structure of school means a lot of adjustments have to be made," Allen says.